Friday, December 30, 2011

Some people are just meant to be together.

Allow me to set the stage: it's 9:30ish and some change at casa de VeeDub this evening. Joey is sprawled out on one couch, rocking his finest pair of fish pajama bottoms and a tee shirt that may or may not have been washed in the last week. He's on his eleventieth episode in a row of "American Pickers" and is also halfheartedly flipping through the pages of the most recent HOUR Detroit.

Similarly, I am sprawled on the adjacent couch, nomming on my Camelbak jug filled with water only because my body is so desperately deprived of nutrients and agua due to the fact that I've fed it nothing but wine, champagne, vodka and Chex Mix for the last week. I'm in a similar getup, though I would never be caught dead in fishing sweatpants, so mine are of the classier Victoria's Secret variety. I'm also well into my seven hundredth game of euchre on the iPad, cursing at my virtual partner for calling hearts on nothing but a 9 and Q. What a whore.

Anyway, Joey musters all the energy he has left from what you can deduce from the above was an incredibly exciting and riveting evening to roll over and announce to me that Sunday is a BIG day.

"Babe, you know that Sunday is like, a HUGE football day. Like, all day."

Please note that this is my queue to read between the lines and instead hear, "Babe, I'm not doing anything on Sunday. So don't try any of your funny tricks on me. No Home Goods. No DSW. No 'family adventures'  to the aquarium because it's Sunday and you have a coupon. I'm only doing football."

Message received, good sir. But little does he know that my plans for Sunday include much, much less activity than his. And so, I reply with:

"Babe, I hope you know that I might not even shower on Sunday."

Elation fills his face and he replies with the same genuine love and adoration he had as he spoke his wedding vows to me some four years ago:

"I love you so much right now it's not even funny."

Like I said, some people were just meant to be. We're those people.

Friday, December 23, 2011

Merry Christmas from the VeeDubs!

An angel of the Lord appeared to them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were terrified. But the angel said to them, "Do not be afraid. I bring you good news that will cause great joy for all the people. Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; He is the Messiah, the Lord. This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger." -Luke 2:9-12

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Workplace 101.

  1. Take all personal calls (yes, this includes job interviews) in the hallway. Or a conference room.
  2. Do not clip your nails at your desk. Do I really need to say this again?
  3. Wear deodorant.
  4. Do not wear copious amounts of perfume. Or cologne.
  5. Do not make up words. It definitely does NOT make you sound smarter.
  6. Unless you literally work in the healthcare field, you are not saving lives. Don't act like you are.
  7. Leave your smelly lunches at home. See also: tuna, thai food, questionable meats.
  8. Reply when someone says 'hello' back in the elevator. You can even grunt it. I promise it won't kill you. Unless you are a zombie. Then, just stay away.
  9. If my headphones are in, it's likely that I'm ignoring you on purpose.
  10. If you're not laughing at least twice a day, you're not doing it right.
It really is that simple, people.

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Time travel.

I was looking through my old cell phone pictures when I was supposed to be paying attention in a meeting yesterday and came across this one:

This was one of the most perfect mornings of my life. My Mom took it back in November when we were visiting Kelli, David and Samuel. We were having a lazy morning, just lounging and playing with our boys. Just minutes later, Alex climbed up and joined the party and the three of us read whatever riveting child literature Samuel was obviously studying in this moment. Sometimes, life is just perfect.

Monday, December 19, 2011

Like mother, like son.

Guess who loves the Sunday sale papers almost as much as his Momma?

He only cares to look at the Toys 'R Us insert, and always grabs it first. He calls it "looking at the toy newspaper." When he finally gets the dexterity to clip coupons, I will be in heaven.

And don't you just love his Hugh Hefner Mickey jammies? Thanks, Grammi & Poppi!

Monday, December 12, 2011

Fat man 2011.

Alex was WAY pumped to visit Santa this year. I invite you to recap years 1 and 2 for proof that he hasn't always been so keen on the fat man and his red suit.

This year, however, couldn't have been more fun. It was all he talked about in the 2 days leading up to our big adventure. And let it be known that he is very specifically asking for a "big blue monster truck" and is promising that he's been a good boy (debatable). He sat on Santa's lap and chatted like they were old pals. He even gave him a high five and said "See you later, Santa. Nice to meet you!" as he walked away. Top ten Mom Moment, for sure.

As you can see, we continued our tradition of the free photos and activities at Bass Pro Shops. Grammi, Poppi, Uncle Kyle and Aunt Jill joined in on the fun, too. Uncle Kyle even got himself caught in a snowball fight (and lost). Alex throws like a girl...but apparently put on his game face for this particular match:

And Daddy and Poppi were, as usual, tremendously useful in holding up large, immobile objects.

In other news, Christmas is LESS THAN two weeks away. Squeeeeeeee!!!!!

Update: Kyle sent me this cell phone video of Alex's initial walk up to Santa. You can see how eager he was...walked right up and started chatting away.

Friday, December 9, 2011

Mind in the gutter.

Ok. So I was spending some time on Etsy this afternoon looking for Christmas pillows (note: got these) and for some reason THIS product was in my feed. I literally spit my Diet Cherry Pepsi out my nose when I saw it.

I know it's a maternity shirt. And I know the sentiment is rather lovely. But I just can't help giggling like an idiot everytime I think about it in the other way. You know, like if Joey wore it.

Not that I bought it for him or anything...

Thursday, December 8, 2011

Just another Thursday.

Birthday bootcamp is officially over...but what a week it was!

Let's recap Day 7, shall we? In a backwards twist, Joey actually took yesterday off work. He did all sorts of things that needed doing (groceries, car washes, etc.) and surprised me by putting up the Christmas lights at our house.

And sometime around 3 pm, he texted me this:

EEEEEE! I literally could not get my work done fast enough. I hightailed it home (but first went to the dentist because apparently I am a masochist and go to the dentist on my brithday) to tear that paper off!

And before I can tell you what was in the box, you need a little backstory.

About 3 months ago, I found a chair at HomeGoods that I absolutely ADORED. And we all know that when you find something at HomeGoods you MUST buy it right then and there for fear it might not be there upon return. I took a picture and texted it to Joey, who was hesitant because we don't have a ton of room to store things (I was in a buying mood for the new house - more on that later). However, I used my ninja skillz on him and he eventually gave in and I bought it.

I just adore it. (And also? Please note that it totally matches my Lill bag I made last time I was in Chicago. Who buys a chair to match a purse? --> thisgirl <--)

Fast forward to about a month ago, when I was in Connecticut. Imagine my delight, shock and awe when I waltzed into Pier 1 (of all places) and laid my eyes on this puppy:

GASP! A matching chair! But different enough style-wise to look totally awesome with my OTHER one! Obviously, I couldn't get it home from CT, but I could surely buy it once I got to Michigan, right? Wrong. The thought of buying and storing another chair for a house we won't move into until June (again, more on that later) sent my dear, sweet Joey into a tailspin. Men just don't get it.

Joey, on the other hand....did get it...eventually. And I'm guessing you can totally guess what was in the box, right? THE CHAIR FROM PIER 1! And the even better news is that he scoured the earth to find one still in the box so we can store it easily until June. Woooooooo!!!

In another twist, you should all know that when I texted my Mom last night in excitement re: the chair (since she was with me when I saw it in CT), her reply was, "Oh, how awesome! Do you have room for 2 of them?" Apparently, she got me one for Christmas. I love that my family gets me. A girl and her chairs...

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Birthday Boocamp update.

I suppose we left off at Day 2. So here's what we've been up to for 3-6.

Day 3: We were at my Mom's house for the weekend, so Alex delivered my spreesprises to me after breakfast. I got 2 fun size Pay Days and a cute pack of snowflake tealight holders. They go perfectly with my PartyLite Nativity scene!

Day 4: My favorite gift so far--he got me a pack of the Sally Hansen Salon Effects nail stickers. The coolest part is that he totally found them on his own! These things are SO cool--I didn't even know they existed. They are thin little "stickers" of REAL nailpolish in fun, cool designs like zebra, plaid, houndstooth and sparkles. He got me the pink ones, natch. They might be my new favorite thing - super durable and WAY easy to apply. And no waiting for real polish to dry...comes in handy with a toddler. They have fun holiday ones like snowflakes and candy cane stripes that I'm going to pick up tonight to use when this one wears off. And I guess you can just remove it like normal nailpolish - we shall see!

Day 5: Another delivery from Alex (he even drew/colored in all my cards!) - three yummy new chapsticks and 2 more Pay Days.

Day 6: This morning, my sweet boys delivered me 2 more Pay Days, a card, tons of smooches (my fave!) and a yummy candle.

I think everyone should celebrate Birthday Bootcamp. Maybe I could trademark it and make trillions? In the meantime, I will keep it all to myself.

Tomorrow I will be TWENTY NINE. OMG.

Friday, December 2, 2011

Day two.

This morning's spreesprises were strategically located near my keys, since I had to leave super early for lame meetings and other corporate shenanigans that help put Cheez-its in my cupboard and Diet Wild Cherry Pepsi in my fridge. Priorities, people. Anyway, I was the proud recipient of a new sunglasses clip for my car (since *cough*Joey*cough* broke my old one), 2 more Pay Days (note: they are fun size...makes me feel less guilty about the quantity consumed) and Yankee candle air fresheners. All very sweet and thoughtful things from my boys!

In related news, we're headed to my parents' house this weekend--spanning the bootcamp celebrations far and wide! #occupybirthdaybootcamp needs to start trending. Make it happen.

Thursday, December 1, 2011


People, people, people! It's that time of year...


For my new readers or those with selective amnesia, birthday bootcamp is one, whole week of ME. Specifically, the week leading up to my birthday, one of the top 10 holidays in North America.

This morning, my card and spreesprises were waiting for me by the coffee pot (yes, I'm still going strong with the at-home morning brewing...). I got a new magnetic notecard for the fridge, a little "K" journal and 2 Pay Days from my boys. Then, at work, I got these:

Seven gerber daises. One for each of the days of BDBC. And pink!

Monday, November 28, 2011

And so it begins...

I'm still here...alive and well. Just been mucho bizzy with work, life and the like. So, sorry!

In related news, the birthday coupons have started rolling in - and I'm so all over them like hazelnut cream in my coffee. BRING IT, free stuff.

In keeping with the season of my birthday and all things happiness, our house is just oozing Christmas. I mean, really. I have an obscene amount of Christmas decorations--more than six of those giant 42 gallon storage tubs. My house has puked garland, sparkle and snowflakes. But it was all worth it when we let Alex hit the button to switch on the tree. I thought he might have a heart attack.

"Mom! It's CHRISTMAS!" <--then I died.

 Welcome to our home!
I've always wanted a cranberry wreath.
And notice the Santa key in the center so the Fat Guy can get in!

 It puts me in a trance. Love it.

At some point, I will probably have
to remove the batteries on that thing.
In the meantime, it's adorable.

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Honey, I'm home!

While I have many photos and delightful stories of sun and fun to share (teaser: a Canadian band of crazies that we met in the hot tub is going to write and record a song about me and Joey!), I must first tell you the tale of a smart and funny 2 year old who lives in my home and answers to "Alex."

The setting: We're driving home from daycare Monday night. Alex is in the back seat, along with my laptop bag, purse and a giant, empty Huggies wipes cardboard shipping box. Joey and I are chatting, probably about dinner or having the shakes from our general lack of alcohol since our return to the States.

Overheard from the pipsqueak in the back seat: "H...W...G...G...I...E...S...spells BOX!"

I turn around, wondering what is going on and ask, "What spells 'box,' Alex?"

Again, he says (pointing to each of the letters on the box as he "reads" them), "H...W...G...G...I...E...S!"

It is at this point I realize he's spelling "Huggies" (with a little confusion on the U) and because it's ON a box, that's what he thinks it spells. I, of course, explode in uncontrollable proud Mom applause and cheer, and he just looks at me like, "Duh, Mom."

Naturally, his new favorite game is "What spells?" So now, every time he hears a new word or sees a new thing, he wants to know how to spell it, and asks, "Mom, what spells (insert word in question here)?" And secretly? I love it. Because it gives me a chance to redeem myself for the 5th grade spelling bee I embarrassingly lost to a nerd with a bowl cut named Matt VanDerWende because I accidentally and all-too-quickly spelled "tread" as "tred" because secretly I was in love with Matt and was distracted by his blindingly golden locks in such a perfectly round shape and his penchant for peeing his pants. To say I've come a long way is a understatement.

So, Alex? We will spell until we've spelled every word in the books. I solemnly promise this to your 5th grade self. And I also promise no bowl cuts.

Friday, November 4, 2011

Mas cervesas, por favor!

I'd love to stay and chat, my sweets, but I've got a plane to catch. For the next week, I'll be at the location pictured below, eating & drinking to my all-inclusive heart's content and basking in the sun until I am unrecognizable and likely in a great amount of pain. And then I will do it all over again. For 7 days straight.

Adios, amigos! Hasta luego!

Also? Bikini waxes are my own personal version of hell. But a necessary evil, ya know?

Oh, and vote for my Mom EVERY DAY while I'm away, mmkay?

Thursday, November 3, 2011

A picture is worth a TRILLION words.

Ahhhhhhhh! I know, right?!?! And let me go ahead and answer your next question: Holly Powell. I actually got to know her through her brother-in-law and have spent the better part of the last 5 years stalking her GORGEOUS daughters. Caroline? Alex would like to marry you. Please wait for him.

Anyway, Holly has recently taken an interest in photography. And by "interest," I mean she's freaking AMAZINGLY awesome and has such a level of talent I cannot even describe. Some people are just born with it, you know? She kindly offered to take our family photos to "practice" a bit more before she officially launches her business--and after looking through the pics from our session, I'm totally sure she's ready.

No other photographer (and trust me when I say I've worked with MANY) has ever truly captured the spirit of Alex. That second to last one of him sitting down and looking up into the camera? Please. It MELTS me to my core. And the last one? Of him giving his version of a "thumbs up?" I will cherish it forever - for it captures a moment in time that I won't ever get back.

So Holly, thank you for allowing us to be your guinea pigs. The time you spent rolling on the ground, squeaking a rubber chicken and chasing Alex and his limitless energy back and forth across that bridge to capture the love of a family is SO appreciated. You have the patience and "eye" that simply cannot be taught in any formal classroom. You captured us. Our family, our love.

I'll be bragging about her a bit more later in the year--once she gets all the legal-schmegal stuff locked down for an "official" business. I won't even pretend to understand what all that is about. Until then, feel free to click here to see all the pics from our session and get excited about booking YOURS.

Also, everyone on my Christmas card list? Please act surprised when you get ours in the mail this year.

Also, also...Vote for my Mom!!!!

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Vote for Momma T!

Last time Mom visited Kelli in the state that shall not be named, she gave her a makeover for an upcoming Mary Kay contest. Voting has officially started, so I'm counting on all my ABM3 readers to help my Mom win a trip to NYC. Because guess who she will take with her, duh??!?!?

And this isn't one of those horrible contests where you have to register, donate a pint of blood and provide your social security number to vote. Just go to the site, find my Mom, and enter your email address. It's super easy! You can enter up to 5 times a day, so please use all five votes! And if you happen to have more than one email address, I'm not about to stop you.

2. Type "Joette" in the search field
(I know, my Mom's name is so cool)

I'll remind you every day until voting stops, so GO DO IT.

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Who cancels Halloween?

The entire state of Connecticut, that's who. I guess an unexpected hammering of snow will do that to you.

Kelli said it was like a movie - trees down everywhere, no power, and utter chaos. They are safe and sound, but what an experience!

And so, October 2011 marked the first time my sweet 'lil Samuel saw snow. And it was DELIGHTFUL. He loves the white fluffly stuff almost as much as his Aunt Kristi. Behold:

Yes, as crazy as it looks, that's a totally legit video taken in Kelli's front yard on October 29, 2011. Mother Nature is NOT fooling around, people. Also? Hi, Ruth!

Monday, October 31, 2011

Happy Halloween!

Or as Alex says, "Happy twick-or-tweety day!"

We took Alex to the Zoo Boo at the Detroit Zoo on Friday night with his Grammi and Poppi - what a FUN time! 

Then, on Sunday, we went back to ride the carousel and feed the giraffes--it was the last day of the season to do it and we've been promising him since about 1984. Oh, the irony.

Have a fun and safe night, everyone! And here's a TREAT from me: enter code 'DRUGSTORE40' at to get 40 FREE 4x6 prints--through tomorrow, only!

Friday, October 28, 2011

My brother wanted to be a weatherman when he was little. I wanted to be a "hair doer."

This is truth. But not just ANY weatherman, he specifically wanted to be Mark Torregrossa from the local NBC affiliate in our hometown. (For the record, time has not been kind to that man. Lay off the teeth whitening, mmmkay? It certainly doesn't detract from your receding hairline.)

Anyway, imagine my delight when Kyle sent this little screengrab over this morning:

In summary: it looks like Kyle found a career that suited him WAY more than weather--teaching. Perhaps he can take our local weathermen to "days of the week" school?

In other news, this rain can suck it. And I'll save the "hair doer" story for (another) rainy day.

Thursday, October 27, 2011

Sometimes, I'm a nerd.

It's really all Joey's fault. Until I met him, I honestly could have cared less about gadgets and gizmos. Or is it "couldn't have cared less"? I always get those confused. Lately, I've been obsessed with all things home-related. So pair that with gadgets and...

Enter The Nest.

Um hai there, gorgeous. And you ask, right on queue, "What is it?" It's a learning thermostat! Invented by a team of freakin' geniuses who also had a hand in the first 18 generations of the iPod. So obviously, we can't go wrong, here. Nerds are smart, yo. So is this thing.

Did you know that the average person changes the temperature in their house over 1,500 times a year? (Well, if you're my Dad you can all but triple that number.) And your current thermostat? I bet it's ugl-ee. Like, punch your grandma in the face ug-lee. But this thing? It's gorgeous. A total conversation piece. And yes, I'm talking about a thermostat. Who am I?

Anyway, this thing:

• Installs easily.
• Learns your preferred temperatures and schedule.
• Senses when you leave the house or come home.
• Gives you tips and feedback on your energy use.
• Connects to Wi-Fi so you can control it from anywhere--even your smartphone.
• Looks good. Like me.
• Has a positive impact on the world and will help you cut your energy bills--go green!

I realize this sort of post is totally out of sorts for me - and it's not sponsored! Totally my own, nerdy findings and excitement. I think I'm going to pre-order mine for Christmas!

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

The reveal!

So yesterday I posted about my crafting inspiration...and after a few tweaks to MY version last night, I'm ready to share it with the world. (Again, remember that what I posted yesterday was the inspiration piece from Pinterest. Yes, Dad. I'm talking to you.)

Armed with  my 40% off coupons, I hunted for letters at Michaels, JoAnn and Hobby Lobby over the weekend. It was SO STRESSFUL. I know they're just letters, but I was so concerned with what size would look good next to what font and what colors could and couldn't be side by side...oh, I almost had a coronary. It was like craftingmageddon.

I got over that fit, and aside from buying an extra E and two too many Os, I finished the day unscathed and with all the necessary tools and equipment to complete my very first big girl craft project.

Joey and Alex had a daddy/son day on Saturday, so I spent the afternoon arranging letters, planning color patterns and painting.

The big H and M were already gold - and half off at Hobby Lobby! I also got the tin letters (O, T, E) from the Hobs...I thought they would add a zip of "different" to the pattern. You know, not all "cut" letters...turns out I was right. The other letters were random finds from JoAnns and Michaels, but I found JoAnns had the best selection. Which is strange, because I'm usually a Michaels girl.

Instead of $6 spray paint, I bought $0.77 bottles of acrylic paint (Except the teal. That HAD to be spraypaint because I plan on using it a trillion times over. I love it so much I literally might spray paint Alex.)

Note the bowl of Baked Cheetos, can of Diet Cherry Coke,
and ever-so-fancy paper plate paint trays.
This is how I roll craft.

Last night, we laid them all out to try and arrange the best pattern. We tried a few:  

After much back and forth, I concluded that the black letter M was just not doing it for me. I painted it the yellow color and that for SURE didn't work. So Joey retreated to the basement and emerged with a random can of silver spray paint. Turns out, that's exactly what it needed.

Basically, I love it. I can't WAIT to hang it. In related news: there's a perfectly good reason it's not hung already. I will cover that soon.

My only hangup is that last H in home. I love the color, but I think I want the size to be bigger. Who's with me?

In summary: I think I have caught the crafting bug. Don't expect me to sew up curtains or decoupage a mural anytime soon, but if it involves spraypaint and shopping, I'm in. And for $30, I'd say this particular craft is a WIN.

Monday, October 24, 2011

Crafty Momma.

I did a CRAFT this weekend. Yeah, that's right. Read it again.

I. Did. A. Craft.

I don't even know if that's grammatically correct, nor do I care. Although, now that I read it again it does sound a tad sexual. The point here is that I saw something that inspired me. And then I re-created it. AND I still have all my fingers and toes and my house is still standing. Parts of my lawn are spray painted red and teal, but that's not the focus here, now is it?

I have a few more tweaks to finish up tonight (after--gasp--input from Joey) and I will post completed pics tomorrow.

Until then, peep at the inspiration piece, courtesy of my new mistress, Pinterest.

Mine is WAY better. Promise.

Friday, October 21, 2011

I did not eat Puppy Chow for breakfast.

Well, that's a lie. Because I did.

And for those individuals that either live in a hole or only eat things Mother Nature provides, I didn't eat dog food for breakfast. I ate CEREAL covered in powdered sugar, chocolate and peanut butter. So it's totally legit.

In other news, "Operation make Joey his freshly ground coffee in the morning" is going very well. Today is Day 3 and I've officially become a pro at setting the coffee pot to "auto brew" at the witching hour of 6 a.m. Also? getting everything prepared the night before is so efficient. Why have I not been doing this all along?!

When all this to-go coffee brewing is paired with my horrible memory (see also: forgetting to bring my travel mugs home every night), I tend to get low on mug options. Thusly, my 2 favorite mugs are currently in the wash. And by "in the wash" I mean they are in the sink, untouched. So today, I'm rockin' a mug with the mugs of my boys:

I know, right?! Christmas 2 years ago. My how time flies. Please also note how adorbs my desk is. Lamp. Desk calendar courtesy of blue soleil, Mentos gum (duh). Love notes from Joey. Everything a girl needs to survive!

Wednesday, October 19, 2011


And no, not from Tori Spelling. From Alex. And it's hilarious. Before I got smart enough to bust out the camera, he was telling tales of "Baby Sam-e-oh who wivs in da 'netticut." I die.

I also love how he is seriously looking for the pages of the stories in his book. And by his book, I mean Joey's copy of "The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo."

And yes, we taught him to say "Uncle" when we tickle him. And he looooooooves to look at himself in the mirror. No self-esteem issues here.

Also? I need a tan. And for those that are curious, day one of "Operation make Joey his freshly ground coffee in the morning" went very well, thankyouverylittle.

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Coffee talk.

My husband has a problem. Well, he has many, but today we're going to talk about his obsession with coffee and random small appliance purchases.

This morning on the way into work he dropped the bomb on me that he wants to buy a new coffeemaker. But not just any coffemaker...the kind that automatically grinds the beans FOR you. Right. Here's how that went.

Joey: I want to get a new coffemaker.

Kristi: For real? You do know that we already own two of them, right?

J: Yes, but I want one that automatically grinds the beans for you. So it's like, super fresh. And we can save money!

K: First, we have a coffee maker, a coffee grinder AND a Keurig. I can basically whip you up a mochafrappawhatevermajig at the drop of a hat. And how will buying another machine save us money?

J: But we have to grind the beans ourselves. This one does it for you. And it's FRESH! And we can save money because we can set the coffee maker to brew in the morning and we can take it with us instead of going to Starbuckies.

K: Is grinding your own beans really that labor intensive? And there's nothing that says we can't brew to-go coffee with one of the TWO machines we already own. For me, it's about the snobbery of having Starbucks in the morning, obviously. But, if it is really that important to you to have freshly ground coffee, I will grind the beans and have the coffee pot set to go the night before. And before I get in the shower I will just flick it on and viola! Freshly ground coffee for my weird husband.

J: Our coffee pot has a timer.

K: ::facepalm:: Then why are we having this conversation? We own all the equipment (and good stuff, too!) to do exactly what you're asking.

J: Butbutbutbut it doesn't automatically grind the beans for you. It's, like, SUPERFRESH. Treat yo-self.

K: Stifling laughter at the obviously appropriate 'Parks & Rec' reference. I really don't understand you. You are an anomoly to me.

And then I promised to wake up extra early every day this week to freshly grind his coffee (no, that is not a euphemism) for a to-go cup instead of stopping at the 'buck. He has officially challenged me to this, because when it comes to sleeping for an extra 10 minutes and basically anything else in life, I will always choose to sleep. Always.

However, I am not willing to purchase and find shelf space for yet another coffeepot in my home. So, in the words of Barney Stinson, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.

Monday, October 17, 2011

You've been warned.

It's officially that time of year. I have packed away the summer toys. The shorts and tanks. The flip flops. And in turn, I have busted out the turtleneck sweaters. The hot cocoa tins. The extra-snuggly blankets. The heated matress pad. The Christmas music.

YES. It's Christmas-ish time. ::happy dance::

I accept and embrace that I'm a raging lunatic. I realize that I'm one of the few that prefer snow and sweaters over sand and shorts. And if you don't like it, that little red X in the upper right of your screen is the door. Unless you're on a Mac, in which case I have no idea how to excuse you from my presence. Why does your mouse only have one button? Srlsy!

And, on the off chance you were wondering...why yes, my Christmas shopping is done. Complete. Finished. Ta-da! Aaaaaaaaaaand it's mostly all wrapped, thankyouverylittle.

In summary: unless you are pervvy enough to catch a sneaky peaky of me in the shower, you will not see my neck until April 1, 2012. And if you hear me whistling "It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year," please do not punch me in the throat. I'm just spreading glad tidings and cheer! Also, how is it almost 2012?

Friday, October 14, 2011

Things I do that are totally, admittedly bizarro.

  1. When using any restroom that is not in my own home, I never take the first wraparound piece of toilet paper. I always unwind it at least 1 time fully around, toss that piece in the loo and use the next piece.
  2. I always hold my breath while walking down the basement steps in my childhood home. Not up, just down. My parents should probably move out before I suffocate on a random visit.
  3. Unless others are needed for dress-up reasons, I always wear anklet socks. White.
  4. I log into online banking at least 3 times a day, because I am certain someone is going to hack my account. So far, so good.
  5. I eat my ice cream and yogurt with Alex's baby spoons because it lasts longer.

Thursday, October 13, 2011

Off with their heads!

I'm sure it will be changed soon, but I can hit "print screen" faster than a speeding bullet. should fire their copywriter. Apparently Geico or Allstate need to get involved in the Queen's affairs...

Click image to enlarge.

See, Dad? My CommunicationS degree does come in handy every once in a great while. ;)

Monday, October 10, 2011


We went out for breakfast on Saturday morning with some friends (hi, Kelly, Mark and Joyce!). Obviously, Alex had the "pannycakes." HOWEVER, when the waitress asked if we wanted the Mickey pancakes, who knew we'd get this little plate of awesome?

Mommy's pannycakes will never again be good enough. Time to start practicing...

Friday, October 7, 2011

That happened.

Apologies to those who are a Facebook friend and are reading this twice, but I wanted to make sure it was documented on le blog as a milestone. And also, I wanted my Mom to know and it's too long to text and she will likely be the second-to-last human being (next to my Dad) to join Facebook.

Anyway, today was "Bring something that starts with the letter D" day at daycare. We talked all last night about what he wanted to bring and settled on the dinosaur and the dump truck. Obviously.

Much to my surprise, when he woke up this morning the little squirt had a different plan. He bounced over to me, chipper as a lark and asked, "Kristi, we go to the donut store?"

Here's what is AWESOME about the above. One: He called me Kristi. I love it. Two: He KNEW that donut started with a "d." And C: He wanted donuts.

He is so his father's child.

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Hump Day.

Blah. I find that even Starbuckies is unmotivating today. If it helps, I typed "globber dot com" in the address bar about ten seconds just trying to get into globber blogger to type this post has been a trainwreck. Happy Hump Day, indeed. Pffft.

And to be fair, I don't really have all that much to talk about. We did experience a "first" this morning -- when asked to brush his teeth (a task typically completed with shining success due in part to the help of Thomas the Toothbrush Train), Sassypants Alex put both hands on his lips and boldly proclaimed, "NO. I will NOT brush my teeth, Mommy!"

It probably didn't help matters that I busted out in laughter instead of remaining calm, cool and collected. Parenting fail.

The good news is his teeth are brushed and we all survived. Perhaps the terrible twos are just a little late knocking on our door.

Friday, September 30, 2011

From the core of who I am, thank you.

It seems so insignificant to simply say thank you...or to somehow find the words to express my gratitude for the outpouring of love and support that came from this post. And for someone who NEVER is at a loss for words, I'm not so sure what to do next.

I wrote the post about our tWIPs for me. It wasn't for you. It wasn't for families suffering similar losses, or for other mothers who have lost babies. It wasn't even for Joey. It was totally, selifshly for me. It was for me to let it out, speak my mind and begin to heal.

But then I published it, and it did so much more than I ever thought possible. Over the last week, I've received more emails, texts, Facebook posts and notes than I could probably count, and each one was so significant. So impactful. So needed.

The Internet is a crazy, creepy place. But it's also an amazing place. A place where perfect strangers hidden behind an IP address and what may or may not actually be your real profile picture can band together in solidatarity. United in pain, happiness, fear, joy, pride, love...and motherhood.

So as simple and insignificant as it may seem, I thank all of you. Those I know, those I don't know and those who don't know me.The tWIPs and I are better and stronger because you exist.

Thursday, September 29, 2011

Word association.

Sleeping. PINK Sweatpants.

Makeup. MAC.

Shopping. Target.

Sundays. Football.

Fall. Chili. (Also cider & donuts but that's a story for another day.)

Ahhhh, yes. It's that time of year. The leaves begin to change and I start buying Jiffy Cornbread mix in bulk while my crockpot works overtime on yummy soups and other things that smack of fall, crisp weather and snuggling.

Last night I whipped up my second seasonal batch of award winning white chicken chili. I'm not even bragging, really has won awards! I've topped the charts twice at the annual chili cook-off at work. I may or may not also be the chair of that particular committee...

Anyway, here's the recipe. It's VERY yum. You can play with the chili/cayenne and hot sauce if you're a wussy on the hotness. Enjoy!

White Chicken Chili
Combine over low heat:
1 lb. chicken breast, poached and cut into bite size pieces
2 - 14 oz. cans of chicken broth
1 large glass jar of white navy beans w/ liquid

Meanwhile, sauté:
2 cups finely chopped onions (make your husband do this, as it is a sucky job)
2 tablespoons minced garlic(get a garlic press so your fingers aren't all sticky and stinky)
1 small can of minced green chilies
3 (heaping) teaspoons cumin
2 (level) teaspoons oregano
1 teaspoon cayenne pepper
1 teaspoon chili powder
Dash of hot sauce (optional)

Combine all ingredients and heat to serve. (And obviously, bake some cornbread while you wait!)

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Photographic happiness.

Remember what I said about Alex being the best medicine? The proof is in the pudding, mah dear.

 He's had a recent obsession with giraffes.
I don't get it, either.
So guess what is happening for Halloween?

Arts and crafts time with Grammi!