Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Kids Say The Darndest Things.

Joe and I recently met some friends for drinks at a local brewery. In restroom of said brewery, I heard what is quite possibly the funniest thing, ever, from the mouth of a child.

I walked into the loo and there was a mom “standing guard” at the handicapped stall. Her young son was inside the stall…how shall I say this…going number two. I know this because as he spoke to his Momma, he was grunting as if he were passing a small gerbil.

The boy was very concerned that the door to his stall was unlocked, but his Mom reassured him that she was guarding the door with all her might and wouldn’t let anyone in.

"But Mom!" said the boy. "What if a herd of elephants storms the bathroom?"

"It’s ok, sweetie," said the Mom. "I can handle those elephants. No one will get in."

"But Mom! What if rhinoceros-es try to get in?"

"I’ve got your back, kiddo. Bring on the rhinoceros. They won't get in, either."

"But Mom! What if monkeys try to get in?"

"Well, kiddo. The monkeys could probably climb over me and into the stall, so I’m not sure I could keep the monkeys out."

(Pause from the boy.)

"That’s ok, Mom," he said, still grunting through his speech. "I’ll just stink ‘em out."

4 comments:

Meg said...

That is hilarious!

Kaira said...

That is seriously hysterical!

Kids, Canines, and Chaos said...

How on earth did you keep a straight face after that one? I die.

Brooke said...

How did you not laugh out loud at this??? I loved this and could totally hear this coming out of my 4 year old's mouth. Actually, I'm surprised he hasn't asked me those very same questions yet. :)