When Football Takes Over Your Life, Part 3.

...and so, it continues. Here's Joey's response to Dad's response to Joey's original request. I die.
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Dear Staffing Specialist at Casa de Talicska:

It is not often during these busy times that one experiences such generous hospitality.

Per your invitation below, I have created a small list of modest and humble yet very much essential requirements to ensure my stay at Casa de Talicska will be nothing short of spectacular.

1. I anticipate spending most of my football watching time in the basement. That said, should I be so moved to venture upstairs, I request that the living room TV remain in a constant state of NFL watching readiness.
2. I believe a chocolate fountain with all the accoutrements will help stave off any sweet cravings while providing a nice ambiance.
3. Fresh cut flowers would be a nice touch.
4. Some aroma therapy would be sublime…perhaps you could provide a fresh locker room scent or maybe the fragrance of fresh cut grass to enhance my football watching experience?
5. I would like a “beer guy.” You know, someone who will randomly appear yelling, “Ice cold beer…get your ice cold beer here!”
6. Concessions would be appreciated. Nachos, hot dogs, popcorn…
7. A fuzzy blanket should it get chilly.
8. Fluffed downy pillows.
9. My own personal bathroom. I do not want to miss any big plays waiting in line to use the head.
10. A giant foam finger so I can raise it high in the air and chant, "We’re number one! We’re number one!" as my team fights for victory.

Thank you for your generous reception. I very much look forward to my afternoon of football watching.

Merry Christmas,
Team Owner and President of “The” AJ’s Wippos