That one time I ran and wasn't being chased by a bear.

I have this friend. Her name is Keliann and she tricks me into agreeing to do things that I would otherwise probably not do. Like running. She has big boobs and I think she uses them to hypnotize me, but whatever.

Keliann convinced me that a 5K on my resume would be a good thing. "You'll be so proud of yourself!" she swore to me. And to make her argument more compelling, she insisted that it should be a Color Run. Because, you know, they're fun.

And so, during the wee hours of this most recent Saturday morning, I put on some ridiculously obnoxious spandex pants (violation of life #1) and a white tee shirt (#2) and ran (#3) ~3.1 miles to a loud and colorful finish line.

And you know what? It was sort of fun. And I almost liked it.

In no way does this classify me as a "runner" and you can also take it to the bank that I ate nothing but Dairy Queen the following day as a reward because all my parts and pieces hurt...but I DID it.

Pretty fly for a white girl.

There are certain compliments I think as humans we all want to hear. "You're so nice!" "...funny!" "....sexy!" "...beautiful!" are a few, but last night I got the single greatest compliment I've ever received in all my existence.

I'm 70% embarrassed to admit I tried Zumba last night. Despite what it may seem, I'm not a middle aged woman with self-esteem issues, so don't worry about me becoming some Zumba-crazed "it's all I live and breathe for" person of insanity. I did it because it was all of un dollar with a Living Social deal and I wanted to break up the monotony of my usual fitness classes and the dreadmill. (Have I mentioned lately that I've lost 10 lbs. so far? Well, I have. Get it.)

Arrive to class. Survey the room. It's the predicable mix of the audience mentioned above and anything and everything in between. I befriended a few septuagenarians behind me and waited for the instructor.

Girl came into the room and made an entrance, yo. She was young, sassy and a gorgeous mix of Latina and African American with a booty to boot. I pretty much coveted her weave (unponytailed) the entire 60 minutes it sloshed and swirled while she Zumba-ed away, not telling a single lie with her hips. 

It might seem like I have a girl crush on my Zumba instructor, and in all reality I probably do. She was SO AWESOME. She moved and grooved and basically put a show on for us. I kind of feel bad I didn't tip her.

Anyway. After class, we were in line to sign in and she complimented me on my moves. ME. THIS GIRL. She looked right into my eyes and said the words I want etched into my tombstone:

"Girl, you got some SWAG!"

OMG. I seriously died right then and there. I feel like this should be likened to Michael Jordan telling a young man that he's a basketball superstar, or Beyonce telling a girl she's got talent beyond her years.

I have arrived, world. I have swag.

What doesn't kill you makes you...

Last night I attended my first in a series of Barre Bee Fit courses on the road to a better me post-baby (I alluded to it here). For what it's worth, I was scared out of my mind to go, because let's all be very honest with one another here...baring your jiggles, wiggles and weaknesses in front of 20 other sweating strangers is the fastest way to board the insecurity train, and I'm the engineer. Group classes with hot and toned 20 somethings sporting Lululemon and tankinis? Not my jam. Sweating alone in shame in my basement? Sure.

I think that's a thing for most women--especially new moms. And it's something we should absolutely NOT be ashamed of, but rather empower one another to be stronger in both mind and body. So what if my body has a little more give and take here and there and everywhere? It's AMAZING, and has done amazing things for me.

And that's what was SO cool about the Barre Bee class, and why I think I'm hooked. I honestly didn't know what to expect going into those 60 minutes of doom (as I referred to them all day leading up to the class), but here's what I know now:

1. The facility - First and foremost, this is a VERY cool place to work out. It's a modern facility, and yet it feels so fancy. There are crystal chandeliers and I'm not even kidding! The locker room area is equipped nicely with a shower, changing stalls, free lockers (with keys you take into class with you!) and the mirrored sink area is even stocked with things you might need post-workout like hairspray, tampons, etc. These girls thought of everything! As for the workout space, it's state of the art. They use an iPad app to run/sync the lighting and music throughout the class and I overheard someone saying the floors are made of something that's used in Nike shoes, so it's soft and gentle on your joints (did I mention you do the workouts in socks? So fun!).
2. The staff - The girls at Barre Bee know what they're doing. After giving the newbies a tour of the facility, they geared us up for the class and things started right on time (always nice when that happens!). 
3. The class - I attended the Barre Bee class, which is considered "the original". As I mentioned before, there are 8 classes to choose from, providing a nice variety and also the opportunity to try new things, work new muscles, and not get bored with the "same ol'" workout routine. The Barre Bee class, in my opinion, was the perfect place to start, because it gave me a good feel of what to expect in other classes. We used a combination of resistance bands, hand weights, the barre and floor exercises during the 60 minute class, so no muscle group was left untouched. What I really enjoyed in this class was the combination of traditional things (like weights and cardio intervals) with resistance bands and stretching and strength on the barre. And boy, am I feeling it today!
4. The journey - I think this is the most important piece of living by the Barre Code. The Barre mentality is something I can get behind because it empowers and strengthens women to love their bodies and give back to it in thankfulness. Throughout the entire class, Lindsay, the instructor, was so positive with her words and inspiration to get everyone to always give a little more, to push themselves harder. And it wasn't done in a cheesy way--she really pushed us to the limits with accountability. What totally connected with me was when she said, "Your body does so much for you every day, this is your chance to give back and make it stronger and thank it for all it does."

That hit me right over the head like a 5 lb. kettlebell. I've never really thought of it that way because in many ways, I'm mostly happy with my body. Sure, there are places and things I'd love to change, but I love it and Joey loves it and that's really all that matters. But think about it: my body is AMAZING. (Yours is too!) Over the last 6 years, mine has carried 5 babies--three of which were miscarriages and two were delivered by C-Section. That's something, isn't it? I've labored over 24 consecutive hours. That's a LOT for a body to do! In addition, it has provided over 700 meals to my babies and carried them more miles than I could ever count. Its taken many falls (I'm a klutz!) and gotten up every single time...stronger, better.

I don't know what motivates you to work out and to push yourself to your limits, but the Barre Bee mentality worked on me in an instant, and I'm excited to be a part of it. Instead of being angry and dreading the pain and suffering of working out and sweating like I usually do, I spent those (very hard) 60 minutes thanking my body for all that it does for me by pushing it to the limits, and appreciating the time I had to reconnect with my own personal strength.I'm excited to see progress in the weeks to come, and I'll be sure to share it here!

I'm headed to another class on Saturday, and I'm really looking forward to it! More to come on my journey...

Whoopsie poopsie.

I'm WAY late in posting Harper & the Hippo, month 2...but I did it today! To keep them chronologically accurate, I backdated the post to December 18. Click here to read it and see her sweet pictures.

In unrelated news, the treadmill and I became frenemies again yesterday. It was terrible and embarrassing and exhausting and it hurt a lot and I was excessively sweaty, which we all know I simply loathe. I'll probably torture myself again today...not because I'm a glutton for punishment, but because my ass is very large. Bah humbug.

The very definition of 'oxymoron.'

Whilst stumbling over the pages of Old Navy's maternity section for some new miu mius clothes to wear over the next 2 months, I came across this:

  It's as if Old Navy just gave me a big, virtual middle finger. Right back 'atcha, ON. Right back 'atcha.

Lies, lies, lies!

So I bought a new scale this weekend, because Alex enjoyed pressing the "beeper button" on my old one and sadly, it went to the curb in Friday's garbage takeout.

Anyway, this new scale is an asshole and tells out-and-out LIES. It gets the literal middle finger.

I suppose it's time to make friends with the treadmill again. More hair sweat is required.

Yesterday, in pictures.

Hair sweat courtesy of nth Degree Fitness in Royal Oak. Also, I was parked when the above photos were so skillfully taken. I promise.